Reading Life Through The Principle - Day 10

Good evening everyone, I hope you're well. It's nice to see all your bright shining faces again, and it's always nice to see so many people I've known over the years and decades, but also to see new faces I've never met before. I talked yesterday about siblings Cain and Abel, and then Jacob and Esau. As I explained, everybody is born with fallen nature. Cain is the older brother, Abel is the younger brother, and there's a challenge in how to deal with that relationship. This became particularly intense with Abel and Cain, to the point where Cain lost his temper and killed his younger brother. That was a tragic disaster, and then we looked at Jacob and Esau. Jacob was rather an arrogant little boy who annoyed his older brother instead of winning his love and respect. He tricked and deceived Esau, stealing his share of the inheritance, which made Esau want to kill him. Fortunately, Rebecca, his mother, was wise enough to send her son away to stay with her brother, remembering what had happened with Cain and Abel. Jacob ended up with two wives instead of one, and after 21 years, he came home determined to make amends with his older brother, even at the risk of his life.

Esau still had much resentment and came to meet Jacob with 400 men. Jacob decided he had to make it up with his older brother because he understood how his brother felt after being deceived ten times by Uncle Laban. His conscience told him he needed to take responsibility for the mistake he made. This is the greatness of Jacob; instead of thinking he couldn't be bothered to make amends, he took action. I read about two brothers some years ago, Lucian Freud and Sir Clement Freud, grandsons of Sigmund Freud, the psychoanalyst. In the late 1930s, they fled from Nazi Germany to Britain as refugees. Lucian became a successful portrait painter, while Sir Clement became a well-known member of parliament and a celebrity chef. An article mentioned that Lucian hadn't spoken to his brother Clement in over 50 years. He stated that family is not important to him and that it doesn't bother him in the slightest. The origins of their rift remain a mystery, but when Sir Clement died, a journalist noticed Lucian wasn't at the funeral. When asked why he didn't attend, Lucian said it never occurred to him. He hadn't seen or spoken to his brother for 60 years and felt no grief whatsoever.

This is often how families drift apart. Sometimes, friends also drift apart over something someone said that was offensive. It's easy to feel like apologising immediately after doing something wrong, but if you leave it a day, a week, or a month, it becomes more difficult to reach out and restore the relationship. The years go by, and people drift apart over a small slight or misunderstanding. It's not just Lucian and Clement Freud; we see this in our own families as well. We may have uncles, aunts, and cousins we haven't seen for years, and we wonder why we don't meet up. Jacob's determination to reconcile with his older brother after 21 years is remarkable. He didn't just pick up the phone; he was willing to risk his life to make amends. Jacob's course was about overcoming his fallen nature and taking responsibility for his mistakes. He understood that making amends was crucial, and this is what makes his story significant.

Jacob's course wasn't about marrying two wives or having twelve sons; it was about being victorious over his fallen nature and willing to reconcile with his older brother. He took the initiative to bow down before Esau, showing humility and respect. This is often misunderstood; it's not about one brother having to bow down to the other. It's about being a good younger brother and helping the older brother overcome his fallen nature. The Freud family, despite their brilliance and creativity, experienced much separation and conflict. Many fell out with each other, and it's sad to see such a talented family not getting along. One of Jacob's great achievements was keeping all the brothers together, forming the Hebrew community, and they all came out of Egypt together. I think about my own family; my mother was the oldest of three sisters, and she didn't get on well with her sisters. We often visited my mother's sister, Joan, but they always ended up arguing. My grandmother also fell out with them, leading to constant conflict.

Even towards the end of their lives, my mother and Joan would argue whenever they spoke. I never understood why they fought so much. In the last few years, I took my mother to visit Joan, but the conversations were always tense. My mother would often phone her sister, but they would quickly get into arguments. I later learned from my other aunt, Claire, who lived in Israel, about the origins of the rift. When they were young girls, they wanted to go to a party, but my mother lied about her age to get in. The man at the door knew Joan was younger and wouldn't let them in. This incident caused a rift that lasted for decades, illustrating how misunderstandings can lead to long-lasting family conflicts. I eventually reached out to my aunt Claire, and we connected well, sharing family stories and understanding the reasons behind the conflicts. This experience highlighted the importance of reconciliation and understanding within families.

Joan was not allowed into the dance, which was quite upsetting for her. She had dressed up beautifully, done her hair, and made herself look lovely, only to be sent home. My sister Claire shared with me that this situation happened repeatedly, and it helped me understand why Joan harboured such resentment towards my mother. Whenever Joan interacted with my mother, old memories and emotions would resurface, leading to arguments. My mother was completely unaware of the reasons behind Joan's animosity, which made their conflicts even more perplexing.

Claire then pointed out something significant about her house. She asked me if I could see anything that belonged to our grandparents, and I had to admit that I couldn't. Claire explained that my mother had taken everything when our grandparents passed away. While my mother was in London, she organised the distribution of their belongings, keeping the nicer items for herself and giving the less desirable ones to my blind aunt. My youngest aunt, who lived in Israel, received nothing at all. Despite my love for my mother, I couldn't deny the truth in what Claire was saying about her actions.

Claire reminisced about a beautiful china tea set that our grandmother had purchased from an aristocrat in Israel during the 1930s. She cherished that china, but our grandmother never allowed her to touch it, claiming that Claire was too clumsy and would break it. I mentioned to Claire that I had the china in my garage, as my mother had given it to me when she downsized. I offered to arrange for her to receive it, and coincidentally, my son Robert was planning a trip to Israel soon. I asked him to take the china with him, and he successfully delivered it to Claire.

A few months later, Claire called me from Israel, ecstatic to finally have her mother's china tea set. She laid it out on her dining room table, and for the first time in her life, she could touch and appreciate it. Her joy was palpable, and I felt a sense of satisfaction knowing that I had played a part in restoring a piece of their relationship. Unfortunately, a few years later, my mother fell ill and was hospitalised in South Africa. I informed my cousin Donna about my mother's condition, and she relayed the message to Claire, who broke down in tears. Despite their tumultuous history, Claire missed her sister.

Realising the importance of reconciliation, I arranged for my mother to speak with Claire from her hospital bed. A few weeks later, my mother passed away, but Claire expressed how meaningful it was to hear her sister's voice one last time. This experience made me reflect on the concept of being a tribal messiah, which involves restoring broken relationships, especially within one's family. Jacob's story illustrates the importance of maintaining family ties, and I realised that reconciling with family members is crucial.

Although I had only met Claire once in my twenties, we began to communicate more frequently. Whenever I visit Israel, I make it a point to see her and my cousins, who have embraced me warmly. It saddens me that we missed out on knowing each other as children, but I cherish the bond we now share. Family is significant, and despite what some may say, I believe it is essential to nurture these connections. This understanding has motivated me to explore the relationships within my own life through the lens of the Divine Principle.

As I read the stories of Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, and their families, I try to relate them to my own experiences. The narratives of Leah and Rachel, for instance, reveal much about the complexities of familial relationships. While some may argue that the Bible focuses on men, the voices of women like Leah and Rachel are prominent and significant. Leah's feelings of affliction and longing for her husband's love are palpable as she bears sons for Jacob, yet feels unloved. Her experience resonates with the broader themes of suffering and the search for acceptance.

Rachel's envy of Leah's ability to bear children highlights the painful dynamics between the sisters. Rachel's desperation for children reflects her sense of worth tied to motherhood, leading her to suggest that Jacob take her maid, Bilhah, as a surrogate. This competition between the sisters creates a painful rift, illustrating the complexities of their relationship. The struggles they face are not just personal but also reflect societal expectations of women during that time, making their stories deeply relatable and poignant.

Zilpah bore Jacob a second son, and Leah said, "Happy am I, for the women will call me happy." So she named him Asher. You can see the incredible depth of Leah's soul, despite the reality of her situation. She's grateful, she praises God, and she's happy. It's quite extraordinary, really, but still, she is struggling. In the days of the wheat harvest, Reuben went and found mandrakes in the field and brought them to his mother Leah. Mandrakes are essentially an antidepressant, so Leah, due to her suffering and difficulties, may have been depressed. Rachel then said to Leah, "Please give me some of your son's mandrakes." Rachel was also seeking relief from her struggles. Leah responded, "Is it a small matter that you have taken away my husband?" This reveals Leah's bitterness; she feels that Rachel has stolen her husband because Jacob no longer visits her. Leah feels neglected and hurt, which adds to her emotional turmoil.

Jacob went to Leah's tent that night, as Rachel had arranged. Leah conceived again and said, "God has endowed me with a good dowry; now my husband will honour me because I have borne him six sons." She named him Zebulun, hoping that Jacob would finally acknowledge her. Eventually, God remembered Rachel, heeded her, and opened her womb. Rachel conceived and bore a son, saying, "God has taken away my reproach." Up until that moment, Rachel felt accused because she couldn't fulfil her responsibilities as a mother. She named him Joseph. I won't comment further on this, as I believe many of the sisters here can explain these dynamics much better than I can. However, it is crucial to examine the relationship between these sisters. The reality in the Bible is that polygamy exists; Jacob had two wives when he should have had only one. Polygamy always leads to problems within the family and is not approved of. It happens, but it usually results from some kind of mistake.

Father made a few comments about this situation. He said that in Jacob's family, Rachel should have become the first wife, not Leah. Jacob's journey to Haran was a consequence of how he treated Esau, stealing his blessing and deceiving his father. Jacob should have had only one wife, just as Abraham and Isaac did. However, he ended up marrying two wives not by choice but due to the circumstances orchestrated by Laban. Rachel should have been Jacob's first wife, but Laban's deceit led to Leah becoming the first wife. If Jacob had married Rachel first, he would not have had to contend with Leah's position. This situation illustrates how the providence failed; the order of the family was disrupted.

Originally, Rachel, as the second wife, was supposed to produce Jacob's elder son. However, due to the conflict between Leah and Rachel, she lost that right. This is where the idea of Joseph being the chosen one comes from. Leah's mother and her mother-in-law, Rebecca, should have united with Jacob to correct Leah's position as the legal wife and Rachel's as the concubine. Once Leah's position was corrected, the ten elder brothers and the younger brother had to follow. Joseph was supposed to be the elder son, but because of the conflict, Leah lost that right. If the ten brothers had united with Leah, they could have restored the order of love centred on Leah and then connected with Rachel.

The reality is that Jacob ended up with two wives, and Leah, as the elder sister, was in a position similar to Cain and Abel. Father mentioned that the relationship between Leah and Rachel mirrored that dynamic. The situation was complicated by Laban's deceit, which led to Leah becoming the first wife. Rachel should have won the love and respect of Leah, but that bitter relationship continued for a long time without resolution. In my personal opinion, Jacob should not have married Rachel. When you consider the qualities of Leah and Rachel, Leah possesses a deeper heart and soul, demonstrating a stronger spiritual connection. Despite her suffering, she consistently lived a spiritual life, praying to God and expressing gratitude. Whenever she named her sons, she invoked God's name, while Rachel was filled with envy and lacked that spiritual connection.

I believe Jacob made a poor choice in marrying Rachel. Leah was the more qualified sister to become the ancestor of the Messiah, which she ultimately did. Jacob was attracted to Rachel's beauty, judging based on appearances rather than the depth of character. I think if Jacob had not gone to Haran, his parents would have arranged for him to marry Leah, as she was the elder sister. The rabbis disagree, suggesting that Esau would marry Leah and Jacob would marry Rachel. However, I believe the rabbis got it wrong; Jacob should have married Leah due to her heart and soul. While the rabbis usually provide accurate interpretations, they can sometimes miss the mark. This situation is complicated, and as I mentioned, there are always multiple plans at play. Father speaks of this as plan D, not the original plan. The original plan was for Jacob to marry Leah and win Esau's love and respect, which would have prevented the need for deception and conflict.

Through painful experiences, Jacob must learn a truth about love. The experiences that Jacob, Leah, and Rachel went through were filled with pain. Love can unite but also divide, as seen in Isaac's love for Esau and Rebecca's love for Jacob. This favoritism caused problems in their children's relationships. When Jacob married two sisters, their previous harmony turned into competition for his affection. Later, Jacob's preference for Rachel's child, Joseph, over his other sons led to further conflict. The lesson here is that parents must love their children equally; favoritism breeds jealousy and conflict. What Jacob learned, and what we learn from his story, is that love alone is not enough. We must also listen to those who feel unloved, as neglect can lead to tragedy. Jacob failed to empathise with Leah's feelings of rejection, which were evident in the names she gave her sons.

Love must be tempered by justice and fairness. Parents should treat all children equally, even if they feel a stronger bond with one. It is crucial that children do not perceive favoritism, as it can lead to jealousy and conflict. This story illustrates that when fairness is absent, feelings of being unloved can arise, leading to jealousy and strife. We see this pattern throughout the Bible, from the archangels to Cain and Abel, and in the relationships of Isaac and Ishmael, Sarah and Hagar, and Jacob and Esau. These narratives in Genesis focus on family dynamics more than any other religious scripture. They highlight the importance of making choices and taking responsibility for one's actions. Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, and Sarah were not perfect; they faced challenges and sometimes overcame them. The key is to learn from their experiences, as they reflect our own struggles. They are not heroes but very human figures who faced similar challenges, and their successes provide a pattern for humanity to follow. That is why we continue to study their stories thousands of years later, as they established traditions that became Judaism, Christianity, and Islam. They got much of it right, and we can learn from their journeys.

As we continue, we see how the family develops. Joseph, the youngest son of Rachel, whom Jacob loved more than any of his other sons, became his father's favourite. Jacob kept Joseph at home and gave him a robe of many colours, a much nicer garment than what his brothers wore as shepherds. Joseph had dreams, which he shared with his family. One day, over breakfast, he said, "I had a dream last night that the sun, the moon, and the stars all bowed down before me." His brothers dismissed him, saying he was being foolish for thinking they would ever bow down to him. Later, Joseph had another dream, telling his family that he dreamt they were all in the field making sheaves of hay, and his sheaf stood upright while theirs bowed down to it. His brothers again mocked him, insisting that they would not bow down to him, reminding him of his place as the youngest. Joseph's behaviour, in that sense, was not very considerate of his older brothers.

Joseph had grandiose dreams, which would have been better kept to himself. His brothers worked as shepherds, and occasionally, their father Jacob would send Joseph with lunch boxes to check on them. When Joseph visited, he noticed that some of his brothers were drinking at the pub, while others were sunbathing. Upon returning home, Joseph reported to Jacob that his brothers were lazy and irresponsible, which led to tension between them. When the brothers returned home after months of hard work, they expected a warm welcome, but instead, Jacob confronted them about their behaviour. They realised that Joseph had been telling tales, and they were furious with him.

The brothers felt a deep resentment towards Joseph, knowing that their father loved Rachel more than Leah. This created a painful dynamic, as they witnessed their mother being treated poorly. Their jealousy towards Joseph intensified because he was their father's favourite, often wearing fine clothes and sharing his dreams. The brothers could not speak to Joseph without their emotions surfacing, leading to hostility. One day, when Jacob sent Joseph to check on them again, the brothers conspired to kill him, demonstrating the severity of their feelings.

Ruben, the eldest brother, intervened and suggested they throw Joseph into a pit instead. This was a temporary solution, allowing them to reconsider their actions. However, when Ruben left, the brothers plotted again, and Judah proposed selling Joseph to the Ishmaelites instead of killing him. They agreed, and Joseph was sold into slavery, taken to Egypt. As he was pulled from the pit, he likely thought of how he would tell their father about the mistreatment he had endured, unaware that he was about to face a far worse fate.

Joseph's life took a drastic turn when he was sold to Potiphar, a captain of Pharaoh's guard. Despite the trauma of being sold into slavery, Joseph proved to be reliable and trustworthy, eventually rising to a position of authority in Potiphar's household. The Lord was with Joseph, blessing everything he did. Potiphar entrusted him with all his possessions, and Joseph's success was evident in the prosperity of Potiphar's household.

However, Joseph's good fortune was challenged when Potiphar's wife, Zulika, attempted to seduce him. Joseph refused her advances, citing his loyalty to Potiphar and his commitment to God. Despite the societal norms of Egypt, he could not betray his conscience. Zulika persisted, and one day, when she was alone with Joseph, she falsely accused him of assault when he fled from her grasp, leaving his cloak behind.

Potiphar, upon hearing his wife's claims, could not believe that Joseph would attempt such a thing. Although he believed Joseph's account, he chose to imprison him to protect his wife's honour. Joseph's life continued to be a rollercoaster of highs and lows, from being his father's favourite to enduring betrayal and imprisonment. Yet, he remained steadfast, working hard and following his conscience, which ultimately led him to gain favour even in prison. The keeper of the prison recognised Joseph's abilities and put him in charge of the other prisoners, further demonstrating that the Lord was with him, ensuring his success in all he did.

Joseph's dream interpretation foretold his fate, predicting that the baker would be executed while the cupbearer would be released. The next day, exactly as he had said, the baker was put to death, and the cupbearer was freed. In his moment of release, Joseph pleaded with the cupbearer, asking him to remember him and to advocate for his release after thirteen years of unjust imprisonment. This situation serves as a commentary on the principle that there is no achievement without effort. God saved Noah from the flood, but first, Noah had to build the ark. God promised Abraham the land of Canaan, but first, he had to purchase the cave of Machpelah to bury Sarah. The Israelites were promised the land, but they had to fight for it. Joseph became a leader as he had dreamed, but he first had to develop his practical and administrative skills, both in Potiphar's house and in prison. Divine promises require human responsibility; they are not substitutes for it. God calls us to take action, and we must do our part.

Joseph's journey illustrates that we often do not know what the future holds. All we have is our current reality, and it is essential to learn from our experiences. We may not realise how today's challenges prepare us for the future. Life is about investing in our current circumstances, doing our best, and learning along the way. God may be preparing us through our current trials to become the individuals we need to be in the future. Pharaoh then had dreams of seven fat cows and seven thin cows, which none of his wise men could interpret. The cupbearer remembered Joseph and suggested bringing him from prison to interpret Pharaoh's dreams. Joseph explained the dreams and advised Pharaoh to appoint someone to manage the economy to navigate the impending famine. Pharaoh appointed Joseph as the prime minister of Egypt at the age of thirty, a remarkable rise from prison to power.

This transformation may seem unrealistic, but history shows that such changes can happen. Take Nelson Mandela, for example. He was imprisoned for decades but used that time to study and grow. Instead of emerging bitter and resentful, he became a person of extraordinary character, ready to lead South Africa as its president. Joseph's rise to power followed a similar path; he prepared himself during his years in prison. After becoming prime minister, he married Asenath and named his firstborn Manasseh, signifying that God had helped him forget his troubles. Joseph thrived in his role, organising Egypt's economy during seven years of plenty, and he was content in his work.

When famine struck, Joseph opened the warehouses to sell grain. Meanwhile, Jacob sent his sons to Egypt to buy food. Upon their arrival, Joseph recognised his brothers, experiencing a mix of emotions. They did not recognise him, as he was now the prime minister, dressed as an Egyptian and speaking through an interpreter. Joseph questioned them about their family, learning they had another brother, Benjamin. This revelation must have stirred feelings of longing and hurt within Joseph, as he wondered about his own place in their story. The brothers, unaware of his identity, speculated that they were being punished for their past actions towards him. They expressed regret over their treatment of Joseph, which deeply affected him, leading him to weep in private.

Joseph's emotional turmoil was evident as he struggled with the desire for revenge versus the recognition of his brothers' remorse. He decided to accuse them of being spies and imprisoned them for three days, contemplating how to restore their relationship. After their release, he devised a plan, instructing them to return with Benjamin to prove their honesty. Joseph chose to keep Simeon in prison, knowing that he had been the most aggressive towards him in the past. This decision was not merely punitive; it was a chance for Simeon to reflect on his actions and the consequences they had wrought. Joseph's approach to his brothers was complex, blending justice with a desire for reconciliation.