🇺🇸Nadeem

Welcome, everybody. It's been a little while since I last spoke. My name is Nadeem, and my wife Romina and our two daughters are here with another family. It's great to be back. I moved to Colorado last November, so it's been about six months. I'm getting used to the drastic weather here. You folks have insane swings — one day it's snowing, then suddenly it's 70 degrees, then it's going to rain. In Arizona it's just hot all the time — 110 degrees for six or seven months straight, and you bear with it.

I like it here. A lot more people walk. In Arizona, nobody is outside. Last time I shared about my childhood and my testimony, and I promised a part two. This is part two, with a quick recap. I tend to use a lot of children's books in my sermons. This one was given to my oldest daughter Ayana, who's five now. It's by a Buddhist author, and explains the journey of life beautifully. You can read it as we go.

Last time I talked about my journey growing up, and how I came into this church community. I grew up in a pretty complicated environment. My parents were from Bangladesh, a little country next to India. Their marriage was arranged. My mom was about 15 years old, my dad was about 32 — so there was a big age gap. Eventually they came to the United States, but the relationship didn't work. Coming to America allowed my mom to separate from my dad. She rebuilt her life while raising me, working full time and going to school. She eventually earned a degree in electrical engineering, worked as a NASA contractor, and helped build shuttles. I'm really proud of her.

Because of all that, I spent a lot of time growing up alone. I learned to take care of myself very early. I learned to be independent — but I also carried a lot of insecurities into adulthood. Honestly, I didn't feel like I belonged anywhere. Then through a friend I was introduced to this community. I didn't understand Divine Principle or our scriptures at the time, but what I saw was families. They weren't perfect families, but they stayed together, showed up for each other, and lived life together. That stayed with me. Looking back, I can see that before I understood God with my mind, I experienced God with my heart through people. I felt less alone.

Later, through a lot of transitions, I decided to leave home at 18. I knew I had to take that step. Through college I stayed connected, and kept learning about the church community and the Principle. I went to New York and did a lot of CARP workshops, and eventually I went through the Matching and Blessing with my wife. Some of you saw the video last time of me and Romina giving our first hug on ABC Nightline News. My mom, by the way, was deeply anti-arranged marriage because of her own experience. She raised me telling me, "Do not ever get an arranged marriage, it's the worst thing ever." Lo and behold… I'm thankful, because I could never have found a wife like Romina otherwise.

Last time I also shared about my relationship with my mom, which was not easy. There were many misunderstandings, and a lot of distance. But through time, through marriage, and through growth I didn't expect, we were able to rebuild that relationship. At the end of her life we were there with her. She passed away in October 2023, and we finally had the relationship we'd both always wanted. It wasn't perfect, but it was real, and full of love. That's where I left off.

This picture today is about taking time to really appreciate what we have. Everybody talks about smelling the roses, but nothing lasts forever — so we should treat it as precious. Romina and I were married at 21 and 22 — very young, very early. After the Blessing ceremony, Romina went to STF Europe to do missionary work, and I stayed in the United States, doing my master's in business and electrical engineering. So even married, we were living two different lives. She was out conquering the world, I was here earning a degree. We had a great virtual relationship — lots of KakaoTalk messages and texts asking how each other was doing.

Finally in November 2015 we moved in together. That's where this next testimony starts. Romina moved to Arizona, where I grew up, and we began living together. I didn't even introduce her properly to my parents. She came straight from the airport, and I just took her to my dad's house where I was living, and I told him, "This is a girl." That was the whole conversation. He looked at me like, "what, who is this person living with us?" I don't know how Romina put up with me.

I honestly don't know how she stayed with me through all that. But somehow we figured it out. Looking back, because we were so young, I didn't overanalyze the Blessing the way I might today at 34 or 35. I didn't ask, "am I fully ready, am I perfect." I just knew one thing — or really three things. I was willing to change. I was willing to put God at the center. And I was willing to get help when I needed it, because I knew there were resources and counseling available. I figured if I held to those three things, I could work it out at that young age. And that turned out to be pretty true.

Divine Principle teaches that the Blessing is not a reward for perfection, but the beginning of restoration. Sun Myung Moon, our True Father and one of the founders of our church, often said: "Marriage is not for the sake of the individual, but for the sake of God and the world." At the time I didn't fully understand it, but I was stepping into it. People say life is about the journey or the destination, but I think it's really about the company you share it with.

We started building our lives in 2016. We built our finances together, and were pretty disciplined. Romina got a great job in the semiconductor industry, and I worked in various industries to gain experience. We also ran a business on the side. It wasn't our main profession, but it was an additional income stream that helped us grow our mindset, and build something together outside of our regular jobs.