A lifetime devoted to God's liberation (1)

You do not know how angry this makes me! There cannot be anyone in history who feels greater indignation than I do. When I weep, there is no one who weeps more bitterly than I do. No one could weep more than I do. I feel God’s heart flowing from my heart as in tears I embrace a thousand years of history on this earth, embracing the lost sorrow. Can you cover up that root, sit there, eat your fill and live in comfort? Even dogs would not eat the carcass of such a wretch. (180-50, 1988.8.20)

Unless a man goes over that difficult mountain pass of indemnity while calmly and happily attending and comforting God, the kingdom of peace on earth will not appear. Such a representative and public person is lonely. When somebody stands up and says, “Rev. Moon did such things as this…,” I feel like bursting into tears. Even though I am an old man of seventy whose tears should have all dried up, I harbor a loneliness that cannot stop the flow of tears of sorrow. You must never forget that there is such a parent. (183-86, 1988.10.29)

Think about how much time I have spent in prison, more than five years in all. Think about how rain dripping from a gutter will gradually make a hole in a rock. None of you would know how bitterly I wept as I gazed upon those drops of water, thinking how much I wished that the teardrops of my love could

bore a hole through the rock of anguish embedded in God’s heart! Gazing upon a flowing stream I thought how wonderful it would be if this stream could be pristine water, serving God so that He could come and bathe in it! How wonderful it would be if I could be a child who could prepare such a home or resting place for God! Unless you experience that deep world of heart, you have nothing to do with God. (185- 45, 1989.1.1)

How long have I suppressed my indignation? How many times have I been overwhelmed to the point that all five of my sensory organs were choked up? It was not for the sake of meeting all of you. It was for the sake of bringing the rulers of humanity into submission, but not through my body, or by guns and swords. Unless I bring them to natural surrender by influencing their hearts through the lineage of love, God’s desired garden of peace will not come to heaven and earth. It will be impossible to build the kingdom of peace. (197-348, 1990.1.20)

There are many difficulties as we live in this world! Who knows what will befall us today? People who cannot break free from this fearful environment have a wretched life. Who will be the teacher who can mentor them amidst this environment of fear and chaos? There is no teacher. I had to weep bitterly and struggle because of this problem. If there is a God, why could He not step into the role of the teacher? Actually God is a teacher whose principle is love. Not knowing this, we harbored a grievance toward God. He is a teacher centered on love. (203-228, 1990, 1.6.26)

Once I came back in the evening tired. I slept for a while and woke up, washed my face and shaved. Mother looked at me and said, laughing, “Washing and shaving is what you do when you get up in the morning. Why are you doing it now?” That is how I live. My heart goes in one direction. My devoted effort goes in one direction. Try praying, asking God what kind of person I am. God will wail in sorrow. He will weep so bitterly that His tongue will come out and not go back in. You have to know that those are the circumstances of my life. (221-163, 1991.10.23)