Family Values and their Link to Economic Well-Being and Social Outcomes in Geneva, Switzerland

I n commemoration of the 20th Anniversary of the International Year of the Family, the Universal Peace Federation (UPF) and the Women‟s Federation for World Peace, International (WFWPI) together with the support of the Federation of Catholic Family Associations in Europe (FAFCE) and the Fondation L‟entreconnaissance jointly sponsored a 2 day Conference at the United Nations‟ Palais des Nations. The conference titled “Family Values and their link to Economic Well-Being and Social Outcomes” aimed at showing the significance of Family Values as a remedy, as preventative and as a Opening Panel, Paul An, Heiner & Carolyn Handschin guideline for a healthy and prosperous Europe and world. The conference brought together experts from European nations and the United States in order to build capacities among allies in civil society and government, to work upon a proactive and convincing strategy and to regain momentum in reversing the current trends.

Day One: June 30 morality, the increasing number of couples who decide to live together without getting married and Heiner Handschin, the advocacy of various diverse forms of family and Director, UPF Office for alternative morality that have increasingly gained UN Relations in Geneva legitimacy.” He further expressed his hope, “that opened the through this conference all of us will find renewed conference, referring to inspiration for the work of rebuilding the institutions the Human Rights of marriage and family throughout Europe and a Council Resolution on greater degree of common purpose and energy to “Protection of the begin to turn the tide back in favor healthy and loving Family” that was marriages and families that can truly be the basis for passed just a few days a world of lasting peace”. before (June 26, 2014), calling for a new era of family mainstreaming. Among Session I: other provisions, he said, this historic resolution reconfirms that. “The family is the natural and Sustainable Family Values as a Means to Create a fundamental group unit of society and is entitled to Stable and Prosperous Society and Nation protection by society and the State” and that the The first presentation was family has the primary responsibility for raising, given by Ms. Lynn Walsh, nurturing and protecting children” (quoted from the Office for Marriage & Convention on the Rights of the Child). The Family of UPF and co-chair internationally agreed re-affirmation of the value of of UN NGO Committee on the natural family to society and to peaceful the Family in New York. She development was the result of a hard-fought battle mentioned the consistent within the UN Human Rights Council over more than failure to include the family one year and many consultations, led courageously in policy at the UN. We are and persistently by a coalition of 16 governments. relational beings and we Mr. Handschin quoted a need stable secure letter to the conference attachments to fulfil our potential as productive, organizers from the responsible, fulfilled citizens. Even international wars Office of the Director can be traced back to a lack of empathy and a General of the UN in properly developed conscience in individuals. Geneva, “We greatly Marriage and family are the very cells for nurturing appreciate the individual character and building trusting information and the relationships in society. The greatest human engagement on this achievement is our spiritual development. In important topic”. debating these issues, our first question should be, Welcoming remarks “what is best for children?” In America the statistics were delivered by Mr. Paul An, Chairman of UPF in point to declining emotional health of children, but Europe. “The institutions (Marriage and Family) have the resources are consistent about the protective been increasingly weakened, especially in Europe and influence of an intact family on child development. the United States, due to a whole variety of social They receive gender specific support from father and trends and forces. These include, of course, the mother. We need to address the lack of human decline of organized religion and of traditional attachment.

Mr. Richard Kane, Rights, or a universally agreed Declaration on them, founder and CEO of will not automatically bring a culture rooted in the Marriage Week values and behavior described within. A built-in International, spoke incentive towards empathy and “Human about his NGO’s work Responsibility” that overrides the need for an to make couples‟ elaborate system of enforcement is necessary. relationships Patriarchy hasn’t worked, nor matriarchy, but a new “intentional” through paradigm was proposed by Ms. Handschin: “Famili- the instrument of archy” – a system in society in which the family unit is marriage. It is the best the nexus. relationship to raise a Parents, children and extended family members child. Although we must be compassionate of those cooperate according to their interdependent roles to who live together, they have fallen for a counterfeit- enhance each member’s value and contribute as a unintentionally. They mistakenly think that whole and as individual members to development of cohabitation is the same as marriage, but if we look the larger community. This should expand naturally at the statistics, it is not so. Women think when asked to an inclusive system of governance in which men to move in together that it is secure, but men usually and women share responsibility similar to the way don’t. However, at a wedding, a man knows that this that parents’ guide and nurture their children. is commitment. 97% of 16 year olds whose families Weakened families disrupt gender roles- as seen in are intact are from a married family in the UK. Also the impact on children in cases of domestic violence for 9 out of 10 of the babies born into unmarried and have sparked “trends” in the definition of family. families, that relationship will be broken by the time It is important to maintain an awareness of the they are 16. Marriage is a written record, a ritual, optimal norm/form for family while identifying vows, but moving in together will not be the same. causes of breakdown (prevention), similar to the way The Swedish Liberal experimentation hasn’t worked. that the medical field handles sickness of the body. A Although the West boasts its human rights, we need healthy body is always the reference point. to re-consider the unlimited exportation of western irresponsible morality that seems to be fuelling Session II: discontent and reactionary agenda among more conservative peoples in the world. Family Breakdown and the Weakening of Marriage and Family through current Family Policies Director of the WFWPI UN Offices, Mrs. This session brought to Carolyn Handschin’s the attention of the presentation was audience facts and “Family: The Place figures from experts where Human Rights about the price of the Values meet Peace and failure of marriage and Human Development”. family, costs that are a Clearly, the mere huge burden to states existence of Human and governments. Mr. Mark Brann, Secretary

General of UPF Europe chaired the session. The first couples and keep their family. Families should take presenter, Mr. Harry Benson, Research Director of their role as a social and political entity and as a the Marriage Foundation-UK asked, “Has government Rights- holder. made the problem worse”? What does the data tell The next speaker, Mr. us about marriage?” There are very interesting Stephen Stacey, statistics about marriages over 10 years old. Long Educator and Marital- term stable relationships outside marriage are the family Policy Specialist rare exception. It is the trend away from marriage from Finland asked the that is causing family breakdown. Marriage is all question, “Is a parent‟s about commitment, a couple with a future. The right to happiness more overwhelming majority of families that stay intact are important than a child’s „married‟ families, compared to „cohabiting‟. (Data: right to get a good start 69% to 15 %). Marriage is an ultimate act of in life?” States have dedication and commitment for the future, building a redefined the social history and memories. Families break down when understanding of couples move in together too quickly, adding marriage to being an institution that cements sexual constraints before establishing dedication. Through attraction. Marriage, in essence, is about aligning inertia, they may choose to have a baby when not human beings with Nature‟s cycle of conception and ready for the responsibility, adding more constraint- birth, with children being cared for about 20 years by until overwhelmed. Is it government policy that two opposite-sex adults. They must commit to fulfill weakens dedication and makes couples less likely to the rights of their biological children to receive, on commit or is it by weakening constraints they make it average, the best possible start in life. Politicians easier for couples to escape? It is unlikely that have to be very careful when creating laws around governments can influence the breakdown of families marriage. It is not in the state‟s interest to only offer through their laws, signals or money. But, the social and financial support after the couples have question remains, “can government help couples to divorced. stay together?” Dr. Anna Zaborska, Mrs. Maria member of the Hildingsson, SG of the European Parliament Federation of Catholic from Slovakia drove Family Associations in from a European Union Europe (FAFCE) based meeting in Strasbourg in Brussels, spoke just to speak at the about the value of conference -convinced marriage to society. of its importance She presented some explaining that she had factors related to family to leave again and marriage in the immediately after her presentation. She spoke about European situation; individualism, ageing population, commitment to the needs of children. She expressed low birth rates, divorces, poverty and social her concern about the recent discussions on exclusion. Family policy in Europe is more of a maternal leave at the European Parliament. The role preventive one, without great expertise available on of the mother at home is not being taking into the issue. There are demographic concerns. High consideration anymore. Is that really what the unemployment among youth makes it difficult to constituents want of their representatives at the EU? establish a home. This will affect the future The terms are changing, degrading. It is no longer dramatically. Young people are connected, but not about pregnant women, but about pregnant workers. related. Our low birth rate in Europe is not At the expense of giving in to “politically correct”, we necessarily intentional and statistics show that many are sacrificing our future generation. Statistics show would like to have another child. The fact that family that 80% of children who are disadvantaged in the US issues have become political issues makes it rather are from broken families. We need to know our difficult to handle. We need to be able to talk about statistics better. We need fair family politics in family in a peaceful way. Although sexual education Europe! has been compulsory since 1970s, what the youth actually ask is “how can we make lasting relationships?” Statistics show that currently young people have respect for the adults who stay intact as

showed the power of civil society that brought about the Referendum in Croatia to protect marriage and family in the National Constitution through a constitutional amendment. Representing the president of the association, he described how the recent lack of support for marriage and emphasis on Session III: „sexual preferences‟ in public policy in Croatia “Marriage and Family Policies in the West – where caused an outcry among the population- once they do we go from here?” realized it. It began with obligatory sex education for This session brought together some very compelling young children. Fearing that the new laws would lead testimonies of efforts from the side of the civil to parents forfeiting their rights of family and society. This included reports from the popular adoption, parents responded. Research was quickly demonstration just held in Stuttgart, Germany that made and evidence pointed to the pattern of other was organized in joint collaboration with “La Manif- nations like Spain where one legal concession had pour-tous”, organizers of a series of very large quickly led to another. With an extremely well- demonstrations in France against the government’s coordinated campaign, 6000 young volunteers were policies and promoting the natural family. Other civil mobilized, 50 reports were written and 750,000 society initiatives were acknowledged, countering signatures (20 %of 3.8 million) collected in 15 days. some of the family un-friendly public policies being The referendum demanded the inclusion of the advanced by local and national governments in wording “marriage is a lifetime union between a man Europe. and a woman” in the Constitution. Many government officials and lawmakers expressed their opposition to The Chair of the the referendum. As the youngest member of the EU, session, Mr. Dieter it was not simple to go against the “politically Schmidt, Chairman of correct” trends. UPF Germany, invited Mr. Karl Christian A very interesting Hausmann, Vice- account was presented President of the by Mr. Walter Baar, Christian Democratic Director of the Institute Union of Stuttgart to for Trends Research in report on the Austria. His statistical demonstration of June research has been in 28. Mr. Hausmann explained that unfortunately the response to the pro family activists are always presented very question: Where is our derisively; as closed minded, old fashioned, world heading and why unsympathetic for the vulnerable… It is known that does the family need to some of the proposed new school curricula being be protected? 80% of developed by LGBT lobby groups are funded by the population lives in cities and they have fewer governments. Local citizens spoke out, saying that children. The extended family is disintegrating. There the state isn’t respecting parents‟ wishes. A legal is a growing economic independence of women and specialist was asked to prepare a report on the issue reconciliation of work and family. There is a growing of acceptance (of the will of the people) over individualism and increase in privacy among family tolerance. Based upon the professional and unified members, change in partnership and growing counterproposals launched from civil society, several acceptance of easy divorce. There is a globalization of of the proposals were changed, including one that industry and a systematic devaluation of family. But demanded sexual diversity among teaching staff in the conclusion is rather optimistic; for sustainability, primary schools. establishing a family is like harvesting, you need to sow carefully at the beginning and realize that the The very striking testimony of Mr. Dražen Vukotić, fruit comes later. The extreme trends and anti- Vice-President, In the Name of the Family-Croatia,

traditional talk is causing people to rethink and a shift Session IV: is perhaps coming. There may be a return to religion “The Unique Contribution of Civil Society and Faith and spirituality. based Organizations in strengthening Marriage and Religions are instrumental in usually protecting the Family in the 21st Century” value of family. This session brought together three faith Finally, Ms. Josie Hauer, communities and their best practices and vision for US Department of strengthening Marriage and Family. Health and Social Ms. Brigitte Wada, Services, brought a very President of WFWPI- factual presentation of France chaired the what the US session. The first Government is doing to speaker, representing cope with increased Islam, was Mr. Hafid family breakdown, Ouardiri, co-founder of asking, what the Islamic Center of government can and Geneva and President should do. Their of the “Fondation de preventive programs to l‟Entreconnaissance”. help reduce marriage and family breakdown invest a It is not necessary to yearly amount of almost 150 million dollars. Children be an expert to see that the family isn’t doing well. living in two-parent, married households statistically Individuals have to learn “we”. Family allows do better in school, have fewer behavioral problems humanity to regenerate. Democracy cannot twist the and are more likely to have successful marriages of definition of family. A family begins with two beings their own. The programs were created under Bill that have to be aware of their role and responsibility. Clinton. They have attracted many couples and it was They conceive their children with love and raise them noted that the greatest benefit went to couples with that affection to share that love and concern coming in with more extreme conflictual beyond their own family. The love of the mother will relationships. There were many different programs protect her children. It is very important that girls can created. The Office of Refugee Resettlement has be educated so they can guide their children towards programs and offers various health and social a better future. In Islam, one should never choose services, including communication and language skills their partner for their appearance or wealth, but for couples to assist them in settling in America. their knowledge (education) and heart. In the long Responsible Fatherhood programs were very run, the physical beauty will fade but the beauty of effective because female headed households have the heart will grow. The Koran says whatever been a big problem- especially in some sectors of the happens, we have to respect the family. society. Diverse programs focus on the benefits of marriage, conflict resolution, and household Christianity was management skills, some on youth and marriage represented by Dr. preparation. There is a treasure of webinars and Nancy Lyon Sonntag, resources that have been collected by these former US Legislator programs that can be accessed. i.e… <twoofus.org>. from Utah and current UN representative of LDS Charities. According to her faith‟s teachings, all of us are brothers and sisters. Reaching out hand in hand is putting our faith in action. No other success can compensate failure at home. Their three pillars are; faith, family and freedom, which serve as a guide through life. Marriage is a great engine of the economy. Every person represents the creative potential which is the real wealth of the nation. The foundation of the human capital is strong family life. Creating human capital begins as man and woman committing to each

other and growing together. Pope Francis counseled How amazing that the place where man and women a team of UN representatives, speaking as well to the meet is the place where life is created, the same Secretary General, Bann Ki Moon about the “place where love meets life and God”. Love, life and importance of family capital in the Development lineage. “Father Moon” often asked us, what is most Agenda. Waning religiosity and decreasing important among the three? Lineage, he would say. commitment to traditional marriage makes it a Lineage connects the past to the future. Mr. Miller difficult time currently. Is it easy to keep fighting? pointed out similarities among the different No… is it worth it? Yes! religions‟ high esteem for parental love. We need to Representing the civil swing the pendulum back to rethink values such as society at large, Mr. purity and fidelity. Josef Missethon, (CEO Institute for Education and Human Resource Management in Linz, Austria, expressed the views of the current, perhaps less religious citizens in Europe who nevertheless attach a great importance to Marriage and Family. It is important to identify the roles and establish value skills, he stated. Define your values based on your family. Values determine our lives whether we like it or not. Each person’s duty is to give answers to questions in life, learning as they Sergey V. Kondratiev, Russia grow. Values are the common denominator. They are the abstract concepts that orientate us, serving as a compass. At a time when traditional values are declining, it is important to the Austrian people to become more insistent to fill the value vacuum that is occurring. It is leading many to search for deeper meaning in their lives- and this is good. Finally Mr. Timothy Miller representing the Unificationist perspective as a Vice- President of FFWPU Europe, explained On the left: Representatives of the Holy Sea to the UN about his personal and FAFCE experience as part of Rev. Dr. and Mrs. Moon‟s Cross Cultural Marriage Wedding /Blessing and the vision of “World Peace through Ideal Families”. He described in detail the need for a “True” Family movement in order to create a new culture of commitment that is sorely missing today and causing a dangerous destabilization. Religion cannot have credibility if it cannot go beyond faith and denomination. If we cannot put deeds to practice, cannot live for others as an individual, unlikely that we can make a good marriage. Religious people have Timothy Miller, Vice President FFWPU Europe an invaluable contribution to make towards peace and prosperity.

Day Two: July 1  Reach out to the levels of family network to foster children. Education at an early age. On the second Day, the 2 morning sessions were  America has federal government doing direct designed to discuss proposals and recommendations funding to smaller or larger independent agency. for follow-up as a result of the conference; for  Programs to help couples to think through life governments, international and national institutions, decisions NGOs and civil society. Each presenter provided their best practices and talking points with the intention of  Target strategic interventions building momentum and solidarity among family policy advocates in Europe. Each of the morning Josef Gundacker, sessions was followed by discussion. Below are some Family Forum selected points from each presenter. Oesterreich, Austria The European Union Session V: views families as a source of economic “Advocacy and Capacity -building” prosperity. Member states focus on:  Child well-being  Gender equality – when woman is economically independent, she would better adjust in the family.  Balancing work and family life - The family is a dynamic form of human coexistence - These days, people focus more on their carrier because they want to be better situated in the society. o The primary needs of the child are Harry Benson of the Marriage Foundation-UK, not material but it is the love and care from the  Policy needs to focus on dedication parents. o Family is not the only source of  Be confident and positive about marriage economic prosperity but it is the source of the  Appoint minister for family human prosperity  Distinguish marriage in the forum - Children sometimes seem to be the problem  Incentives for marriage in the early years but they are also the solution. Life functions in  Support relationships in the early years the principle of give and take. -> Why human beings cannot establish peace and love in their relationship? Because violate principle of give and take. - When we look and think differently, we act differently

Session VI: “Alliances and Strategies for the Way Forward”

Josie Hauer, Department of Health and Social Services, USA  If women bear a baby before the age of 20, not educated for so long, they are most likely to stay in poverty.  Governments can massively educate men on the importance of their role as father.

Maria Hildingsson big impact on the society since the Family is the  other than UN commemoration of international basic unit of the society. family day, there so many treaties, organizations  Gender theory - difference between men and and institutions so we have so many women whether it is psychological or physical or opportunities education difference.  Everyone can make difference. Nothing is Where do we go from here? impossible if you have a good will and a will to  Adequate income, adequate services and enough work together. Go forward in positive way with time to spend together. Without enough time, positive wordings. We need to care for the family hard to develop the relationship between couples not only our own family but all the other families and the family by showing that family life and marriage can be  Convey our vision and map the current situation something positive and promoting positive image.  Understand our opponents and their strategy: Carolyn Handschin what lies behind their motivation?  Identify our opportunities  Resolution on „Protection of the family‟ is just a  Set up a roadmap: maintain our positions and starting point, but a chance to reassess and plan our next steps launch a counterproposal to the current  Cover all areas of concern – strengthening our disruptive “family trends”. networks  Solidarity and momentum are so important. As  Capacity to mobilize quickly: nurture our NGO‟s, we have responsibility to disseminate networks at all levels (local, national, regional, talking/advocacy points and clear strategy for the international) broader population to be confident to respond to  Provide reliable information ((Media and politics) the pressures of alternative views…moving then about our issues, as well as positive wording on out of the defensive to the offensive. the issues of the families. Convey the positive  Set up NGO committee on the family in Geneva. message of all the benefits of the marriage Lynn Walsh  Intelligence : need for monitoring  We have to have parental heart to even those who see differently than we do- We need Margriet Heijdemann, educator and family counselor, unconditional love and living principles. the Netherlands  We need compassion and need understanding -  Help children grow to their full potential Human to Human connection.  Growing up doesn‟t automatically result in maturing -> A warm and safe relationship with a Josie Hauer caring adult is needed -> attachment is the pre-  To make a good and sustainable partnership, we eminent need. need to establish strategic alliance.  6 phased of attachment: Senses with mother;  Should also take a look at older generations. Sameness; Belonging & loyalty; Significance to be Health of the elderly (talking about foster dear to someone and close connection; Love. children). Being known.  Importance of education of the role of man at an  No need for more expert programs to get more early childhood. interest of students or anything, but need more attachment. Heiner Handschin  Behavioral based resources to encourage better  NGOs and governments need to work together attachment and use common sense in making family policies. It is important that the people’s democratic rights Session VII: are being respected and that government Closing Session agencies refrain from dictating what suits most their agendas. A core concern is to protect This session was an opportunity for a few brief closing children these days from very controversial thoughts from the organisers. perspectives on Marriage and Family. There is a Maria Hildingsson need to strengthen the natural family and  Each one of us can make a difference, wherever empower parents to take more responsibility for we are and whichever talents we have. Each raising and educating children to become family can make a difference whether you are responsible and caring citizens in today’s society, married or not. Each member of the family has nation and world.

In commemoration of the 20th Anniversary the International Year of the Family, 5. Establish a NGO Committee on the Family at the UN in Geneva (CONGO or independent). RECOMMENDATIONS and ACTION STEPS 6. Encourage the candidacy for political office of those supportive of marriage and family “Family Values and their link to Economic Well-Being 7. UN – global day of Parents – June 1st each year – and Social Outcomes” May 15th International Day of the Family – make Conference at use of these International UN days to raise UNITED NATIONS’ GENEVA PALAIS DES NATIONS positive images of marriage and family at the June 30 – July 1, 2014 Organized by: grass roots level 8. Improve media advocacy through Letter‟s to UN OFFICE GENEVA OF THE UNIVERSAL PEACE editors in support of pro-family articles and FEDERATION (UPF), WOMEN‟S FEDERATION FOR policy development with collaboration among WORLD PEACE INTERNATIONAL (WFWPI), associations With the support of: 9. Create a forum that facilitates ongoing THE FEDERATION OF CATHOLIC FAMILY interaction among pro-family advocates– ASSOCIATIONS IN EUROPE, suggestion connect via Face book accounts or THE MARRIAGE WEEK INTERNATIONAL, Google Groups THE MARRIAGE FOUNDATION UK, 10. Generate a weekly or monthly electronic FAMILIENFORUM OESTERREICH, „Newsletter‟ to influence politicians and public LDs CHARITIES, GENEVA opinion FONDATION DE L‟ENTRECONNAISSANCE, GENEVA 11. Stimulate systematic outreach to human FAMILY FEDERATION FOR WORLD PEACE AND resource departments to advocate the value of UNIFICATION EUROPE (FFWPU) stable families regarding health and productivity The organizers, contributors and participants, by 12. Create Book Clubs to support young couples and consensus, agreed to promote the following parents in small groups recommendations and action steps: 13. Create and share advocacy points to popularize marriage and family - positive terminology – 1. Organize conferences in Europe on the topic of „optimum human development‟ – positive not Marriage & Family twice a year anti – „marriage matters‟. 2. Gather data in each nation to illustrate the social 14. Prioritize children‟s needs in Family and Human value of marriage and disseminate it Rights matters. 3. Lobby to government to lower taxes and offer 15. Formulate a curriculum for a pro-marriage and other incentives rewarding stable marriages family education programs in schools as 4. Organise celebrations and campaigns locally and replacement for current sex education on a European level to honour family and programs. recognise parents (Family Values Banquets, “Family Pride” Street Parades, etc.) Geneva, Palais des Nations, July 1, 2014